01-25-2019, 05:52 AM
Sara was all over the place. Here one second, gone the next. Nonsensical answers or off the cuff responses to things they never even asked.
He remember Ma and Pop taking him and his brother and sister to the park. A Moscow winter changed everything enough you could hardly recognize the same place. The river was frozen over, solid looking. But his hesitant steps had freaked pops out, pulling him free before he'd taken more than one or two. It had been enough.
Frozen though the surface was, the water still flowed underneath. Fast and furious. And the barrier was very thin.
And he got it. He couldn't imagine his sisters dying. Or his brothers for that matter. But in a fighting pit? Beaten and bloodied? It was weird. He didn't think anything of it, going into one. Not a worry. And his injuries really were annoyances more than anything else.
But what if Ma had seen them? He was always her little boy. That never went away. So Ma is seeing her son beaten and bloody and bruised...how would she feel about that?
Danya's touch to his cheek, the pain in her eyes, the lace of anger in her throat. So casual, he was, with his safety and health. The idea of dying....it was alien to him. Scars and bruises and bloody lips were things to laugh off- or even be proud of. "Chicks dig scars." That's what it meant to be a man. But to those that loved him...He remembered Danya's accusatory look, her appraisal of his injuries. "Whatever that is, can’t come here and those things tend to follow people home."
Ivan's choices had consequences. But then, more personal. More cutting. More real. "Loving others can’t happen if you don’t love yourself." Her whisper. Being cavalier was not showing love. To anyone.
He'd be true to himself. He had to. But risking himself on stupid whims. That was over.
Danya would not cry over him, carry the pain of his loss due to his stupidity or ego. Nor would his family.
And somehow, he wanted to share with Sara. He stepped toward her, but she held him back. Which was ok, he realized. His revelation was not hers. Just for the moment he had thought he understood.
But she didn't want to be alone. And yeah, he could do that. He and Nox. Somewhere, the line was crossed. Sara was not a goal to make Nox feel better- not that he was was really out to score anyway, truth be told. The guy seemed overwhelmed, was the truth. No, she was a person who had entered his personal sphere.
And that was all the difference. He had never been disrespectful. Some women knew what they wanted and were comfortable with that. Alex was like that. Honest. And he didn't mind the game, then. If Sara had been that person, if he was single....yeah. Game on.
But Sara needed something more.
So ivan met her down at the bar. And his demeanor was different. Yeah, she was was still hot. And yet that had no bearing on his interest in the slightest. She had entered little sister territory.
He sat down. "I'm sorry about your sister. I have a couple. The older just had a baby. The youngest is 13. I can't imagine how hard that must have been for you." Another girl came by trying to catch his eye and he ordered a beer- close enough to water, after all- and popped the top.
He watched her for a moment, taking a swig of his beer. "We'll stay around however long you need . Don't worry about performing or duties or anything. Relax. Pretend its a break. Or a night off. If your boss has has an issue, I'll talk to 'em."
He remember Ma and Pop taking him and his brother and sister to the park. A Moscow winter changed everything enough you could hardly recognize the same place. The river was frozen over, solid looking. But his hesitant steps had freaked pops out, pulling him free before he'd taken more than one or two. It had been enough.
Frozen though the surface was, the water still flowed underneath. Fast and furious. And the barrier was very thin.
And he got it. He couldn't imagine his sisters dying. Or his brothers for that matter. But in a fighting pit? Beaten and bloodied? It was weird. He didn't think anything of it, going into one. Not a worry. And his injuries really were annoyances more than anything else.
But what if Ma had seen them? He was always her little boy. That never went away. So Ma is seeing her son beaten and bloody and bruised...how would she feel about that?
Danya's touch to his cheek, the pain in her eyes, the lace of anger in her throat. So casual, he was, with his safety and health. The idea of dying....it was alien to him. Scars and bruises and bloody lips were things to laugh off- or even be proud of. "Chicks dig scars." That's what it meant to be a man. But to those that loved him...He remembered Danya's accusatory look, her appraisal of his injuries. "Whatever that is, can’t come here and those things tend to follow people home."
Ivan's choices had consequences. But then, more personal. More cutting. More real. "Loving others can’t happen if you don’t love yourself." Her whisper. Being cavalier was not showing love. To anyone.
He'd be true to himself. He had to. But risking himself on stupid whims. That was over.
Danya would not cry over him, carry the pain of his loss due to his stupidity or ego. Nor would his family.
And somehow, he wanted to share with Sara. He stepped toward her, but she held him back. Which was ok, he realized. His revelation was not hers. Just for the moment he had thought he understood.
But she didn't want to be alone. And yeah, he could do that. He and Nox. Somewhere, the line was crossed. Sara was not a goal to make Nox feel better- not that he was was really out to score anyway, truth be told. The guy seemed overwhelmed, was the truth. No, she was a person who had entered his personal sphere.
And that was all the difference. He had never been disrespectful. Some women knew what they wanted and were comfortable with that. Alex was like that. Honest. And he didn't mind the game, then. If Sara had been that person, if he was single....yeah. Game on.
But Sara needed something more.
So ivan met her down at the bar. And his demeanor was different. Yeah, she was was still hot. And yet that had no bearing on his interest in the slightest. She had entered little sister territory.
He sat down. "I'm sorry about your sister. I have a couple. The older just had a baby. The youngest is 13. I can't imagine how hard that must have been for you." Another girl came by trying to catch his eye and he ordered a beer- close enough to water, after all- and popped the top.
He watched her for a moment, taking a swig of his beer. "We'll stay around however long you need . Don't worry about performing or duties or anything. Relax. Pretend its a break. Or a night off. If your boss has has an issue, I'll talk to 'em."