Since coming to Moscow the world had tumbled and tumbled until it was no longer what it once was. Nox hadn't even set food on Russian soil before the world upended. His father would be furious to know he was going to Russia - the CCD he'd hated the other side of the ocean for years. It was breed in him from his father. But Aurora and Nox had thought differently when they decided. They decided together that they would come to the homeland of their ancestry - they would come to Moscow and be named Atharim full fledged by the grace of the Pope himself. Or so the story had gone after they'd become gods. The most hated things on earth for the Atharim and he was one.
Thinking about it all made Nox want to hurl. So instead of thinking about it and dwelling he thought about the future. The future which brought him no hope. He'd be hunted the remainder of his life. Nox knew that now. They'd come at him once, they'd come again. There was no time to waste, yet he felt empty inside. Devoid of all things, all hope. Sage and Aiden didn't help any with their blissful love. Fuck them.
He didn't need to have a future, Cruz and Dorian, even Aiden and Sage deserved that. Ana and Christian most of all they just got pulled into the unlucky situation. Though Ana... she was the mother of a god. Nox sighed as he pressed up on his hands into a high plank before moving into downward dog. Yoga was becoming more and more required to get through a day. To focus on his body and his body alone, drown in the calm cool serenity of the power lingering at the edge.
But not touching it. It no longer brought peace of mind. It brought pain and memories and things Nox didn't want to feel, but he did every time he touched the power god had granted him. God... no... he had nothing to do with it, even if Aria believed, Nox didn't. This was science - genetic. Why else kill parents. The perfect storm came and that storm came with Apolyon - Ascendancy. Another man who probably wanted him dead and for what? Because he was Atharim.
That was the theme in all this misery. The Atharim - if you got down to it his mother died because of the Atharim. If she'd never met his father.... Nox knew he'd never have been born,but she'd never have died either... except she would have, his father saved her. It was a well told story.
Nox pushed it out of his head as he stood into Warrior 1. So many reasons to leave the Atharim behind - to go find a hiding place and live and die there. But there were still monsters out there. Monsters that could devour the world whole and even the Ascendancy in all his grand glory could never win if they all came calling at once. He barely survived the Ijiraq.
Nox shuddered at the memory of the ball and yawned in response to the weariness of his body. But he pushed harder. He needed a direction. A life outside of the Atharim. Warrior 2. Nox knew that. But he also knew that he had no skills. Not a single one besides survival and killing monsters - that wasn't real world in the least. So for now Nox pushed his body and his skills with the power. He'd defend this family with his life. Which meant he had to grab the power, it was painful - more so than ever before as he reached into the dark light and pulled it to heart. It struggled as it burned his soul. It fought against his control as he wove the light show Methos' stage hand had used at the misshapen concert. It danced in fury, in chaos and Nox let it eat at his very being, but he didn't let go. It stung and burned and he felt the Ijiraq feeding on him. It was all in his head - he knew it.
The music in Nox's ears ceased as a text came over his wallet. Nox touched his left earbud and it read the text. Hey Nox. This is Ivan. I need your help. I need to learn this power
Why did Ivan always come to him when he needed to learn? He knew exactly what he was, where he went in life, his beliefs, he'd left him to fucking die on his own because he couldn't stomach his truth. The voice in his head, the one that sounded like his sister told him, he had to help him, the power was dangerous if you experimented. "Remember how many times I had to heal you."
Nox sighed and headed for his make shift room for clean clothes and a shower as he pulled out his wallet and typed Ivan a reply. "I'm free now. Where do you want to meet?"
Thinking about it all made Nox want to hurl. So instead of thinking about it and dwelling he thought about the future. The future which brought him no hope. He'd be hunted the remainder of his life. Nox knew that now. They'd come at him once, they'd come again. There was no time to waste, yet he felt empty inside. Devoid of all things, all hope. Sage and Aiden didn't help any with their blissful love. Fuck them.
He didn't need to have a future, Cruz and Dorian, even Aiden and Sage deserved that. Ana and Christian most of all they just got pulled into the unlucky situation. Though Ana... she was the mother of a god. Nox sighed as he pressed up on his hands into a high plank before moving into downward dog. Yoga was becoming more and more required to get through a day. To focus on his body and his body alone, drown in the calm cool serenity of the power lingering at the edge.
But not touching it. It no longer brought peace of mind. It brought pain and memories and things Nox didn't want to feel, but he did every time he touched the power god had granted him. God... no... he had nothing to do with it, even if Aria believed, Nox didn't. This was science - genetic. Why else kill parents. The perfect storm came and that storm came with Apolyon - Ascendancy. Another man who probably wanted him dead and for what? Because he was Atharim.
That was the theme in all this misery. The Atharim - if you got down to it his mother died because of the Atharim. If she'd never met his father.... Nox knew he'd never have been born,but she'd never have died either... except she would have, his father saved her. It was a well told story.
Nox pushed it out of his head as he stood into Warrior 1. So many reasons to leave the Atharim behind - to go find a hiding place and live and die there. But there were still monsters out there. Monsters that could devour the world whole and even the Ascendancy in all his grand glory could never win if they all came calling at once. He barely survived the Ijiraq.
Nox shuddered at the memory of the ball and yawned in response to the weariness of his body. But he pushed harder. He needed a direction. A life outside of the Atharim. Warrior 2. Nox knew that. But he also knew that he had no skills. Not a single one besides survival and killing monsters - that wasn't real world in the least. So for now Nox pushed his body and his skills with the power. He'd defend this family with his life. Which meant he had to grab the power, it was painful - more so than ever before as he reached into the dark light and pulled it to heart. It struggled as it burned his soul. It fought against his control as he wove the light show Methos' stage hand had used at the misshapen concert. It danced in fury, in chaos and Nox let it eat at his very being, but he didn't let go. It stung and burned and he felt the Ijiraq feeding on him. It was all in his head - he knew it.
The music in Nox's ears ceased as a text came over his wallet. Nox touched his left earbud and it read the text. Hey Nox. This is Ivan. I need your help. I need to learn this power
Why did Ivan always come to him when he needed to learn? He knew exactly what he was, where he went in life, his beliefs, he'd left him to fucking die on his own because he couldn't stomach his truth. The voice in his head, the one that sounded like his sister told him, he had to help him, the power was dangerous if you experimented. "Remember how many times I had to heal you."
Nox sighed and headed for his make shift room for clean clothes and a shower as he pulled out his wallet and typed Ivan a reply. "I'm free now. Where do you want to meet?"
![[Image: nox_sig.gif]](http://thefirstage.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/08/nox_sig.gif)