Nox didn't care, and waiting outside would mean missing if the twins or Raffe reappeared. So he remained. He didn't care if they stared, or whispered. Didn't matter, everyone gossiped and it didn't bother him. At least not on the outside.
Nox laughed at the suggestion. "I did let go, had a perfect little plan that fell apart the moment I sedated myself to the point the power was just a memory. It's the reason the girls are currently in my care."
His thoughts drifted to the hazed memories. "I thought I'd caged myself well in corner in the caves where if shit hit the fan Sage might find me easily on a camera but safe enough from prying eyes. Little did I know that two little girls were playing hide and seek and Morgan found her way into a crevice in the corner that I'd taken as part of my prison. If it weren't for her little bunny she'd likely not be here. Without the power, my control over the primal instincts is truly limited. Learned two things. And now I have the trust of one of the twins, the other hates me with a passion."
Nox's gaze drifted off to where the twins had ascounded with his hopeful still boyfriend but that was looking further and further away as the time passed on. "Been through a lot the last few weeks. I hear he was sick and I wasn't there. I told him I broke my promise of fidelity upon my return, then I disappeared into the night to give him space and he took a leave and I've not seen him for a week. To say things are tense well that would be an understatement."
He looked to Zeke and wondered why he'd just said what he did. "I don't know what he's been doing in Paragon. I don't know that he knows that I know he was there. Not sure he wants to talk about it, not sure he wants to talk about anything -- ever." Nox sighed with his own issues creeping in. His insecurities, his talking too much, his anger. It boiled just the other side of his mind. He wanted to be angry. Wanted to blame someone other than himself for the shit that's going on. But he intended to take responsibility for his actions. He chose to let the horde win. It hadn't been a choice, but he hadn't fought back. He was tired. So tired of fighting the horde. He hurt both physically and mentally. His body was prickled with the pain of their deaths, the sadness of throwing one he loved into the fires to feel their writhing dying body as if it were his own. Tears filled his eyes and he wiped at them before they did more than blur his vision.
Nox continued from his momentary lapse. " He looks like shit. He's hiding again and that's my fault." Nox tugged at his collar to hide himself but the hoodie didn't cover much as he pulled it up higher on his shoulder. It wasn't his gesture, but a mimic of something Raffe might do to hide the scar on his neck. "We are at a strange place. The fact he's here should say something, but he's just going through the motions. Can't say I'm doing much more than that. I'd give him the world if I had it. I can't even keep a fucking promise."
Nox laughed at the suggestion. "I did let go, had a perfect little plan that fell apart the moment I sedated myself to the point the power was just a memory. It's the reason the girls are currently in my care."
His thoughts drifted to the hazed memories. "I thought I'd caged myself well in corner in the caves where if shit hit the fan Sage might find me easily on a camera but safe enough from prying eyes. Little did I know that two little girls were playing hide and seek and Morgan found her way into a crevice in the corner that I'd taken as part of my prison. If it weren't for her little bunny she'd likely not be here. Without the power, my control over the primal instincts is truly limited. Learned two things. And now I have the trust of one of the twins, the other hates me with a passion."
Nox's gaze drifted off to where the twins had ascounded with his hopeful still boyfriend but that was looking further and further away as the time passed on. "Been through a lot the last few weeks. I hear he was sick and I wasn't there. I told him I broke my promise of fidelity upon my return, then I disappeared into the night to give him space and he took a leave and I've not seen him for a week. To say things are tense well that would be an understatement."
He looked to Zeke and wondered why he'd just said what he did. "I don't know what he's been doing in Paragon. I don't know that he knows that I know he was there. Not sure he wants to talk about it, not sure he wants to talk about anything -- ever." Nox sighed with his own issues creeping in. His insecurities, his talking too much, his anger. It boiled just the other side of his mind. He wanted to be angry. Wanted to blame someone other than himself for the shit that's going on. But he intended to take responsibility for his actions. He chose to let the horde win. It hadn't been a choice, but he hadn't fought back. He was tired. So tired of fighting the horde. He hurt both physically and mentally. His body was prickled with the pain of their deaths, the sadness of throwing one he loved into the fires to feel their writhing dying body as if it were his own. Tears filled his eyes and he wiped at them before they did more than blur his vision.
Nox continued from his momentary lapse. " He looks like shit. He's hiding again and that's my fault." Nox tugged at his collar to hide himself but the hoodie didn't cover much as he pulled it up higher on his shoulder. It wasn't his gesture, but a mimic of something Raffe might do to hide the scar on his neck. "We are at a strange place. The fact he's here should say something, but he's just going through the motions. Can't say I'm doing much more than that. I'd give him the world if I had it. I can't even keep a fucking promise."
![[Image: nox_sig.gif]](http://thefirstage.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/08/nox_sig.gif)