7 hours ago
(This post was last modified: 7 hours ago by Rachel Shale.)
Rachel listened to what he said. She could feel the tears coming. She hated that. Hated that this hurt so bad. There was no sobbing, only a release of tears from her eyes. She wiped them as he finished. ”I really like her. I don’t want to screw this up. I made a stupid choice and it’s hard to not think that I’m going to ruin this. Elyse is special. She’s incredibly kind and sweet. Being with her makes me so happy. Even when I was living in terror, I felt something in her presence. And there’s always this voice. And it’s always HIS voice saying it. That I’m not good enough for her. I don’t deserve her.”
She wiped her eyes again. ”His voice is still there. Telling me things like - I’m a slut and belong to him. No one else can have me. It’s getting quieter. I know the words aren’t true. I know he’s fucking dead, but he’s still here.” sh pointed to her head. ”And I don’t know how to get him out.”
She sniffled. She hadn’t planned on letting that all out. It had just came out. Hayden was surprisingly easy to talk to. ”Elyse knows some of that. Em knows some too. Jared knows a bit. Feels good to get it all out though even if I don’t know what to do about it.” she finished off her drink. ”This is why I’ve gone sober, she said with a light laugh. ”Could you imagine that outburst if I was inebriated. Could I get a refill of this please?”
She wiped her eyes again. ”His voice is still there. Telling me things like - I’m a slut and belong to him. No one else can have me. It’s getting quieter. I know the words aren’t true. I know he’s fucking dead, but he’s still here.” sh pointed to her head. ”And I don’t know how to get him out.”
She sniffled. She hadn’t planned on letting that all out. It had just came out. Hayden was surprisingly easy to talk to. ”Elyse knows some of that. Em knows some too. Jared knows a bit. Feels good to get it all out though even if I don’t know what to do about it.” she finished off her drink. ”This is why I’ve gone sober, she said with a light laugh. ”Could you imagine that outburst if I was inebriated. Could I get a refill of this please?”