04-05-2019, 07:17 PM
Natalie watched his expression like the burden of their problems might begin to show cracks, but if the weight bowed him he still rose to the task of shouldering it without complaint. She brooked no argument against any of his suggestions, at least a little glad to know he understood the severity of their circumstances enough to realise they could not risk leaving Cayli on her own. Until he spoke the words, she had not truly understood how much she had needed to hear it.
Little showed, of course. Compartmentalising was something she was good at, and the soothe of reassurance was ultimately no more useful to her than the fear billowing behind her ribcage. Even so, something of a dark smile hooked for the word normal, though she said nothing; it wasn’t like she didn’t understand the meaning. Though she doubted the ruse would hold for long.
“Are you sure you want to be the one to look for Axel?” She would not stop him, but neither would she allow a sense of duty to pull him into the arms of unnecessary pain. Though if Axel had an ounce of sense, he would not still be here. If it transpired he was, the risk must have some discernible gain for him, which might in turn allow for leverage. Or maybe he felt he had nothing to fear. It was a slim hope but better than idling while they waited for the noose to tighten. Truthfully it was not the descent of armies she feared, but something more insidious. Time haemorrhaged a fatal wound, and that was where the guilt gnawed; her reluctance to stem the flow.
Jensen urged temperance, but Natalie's gut burned for confrontation; for the tomb petty politics made of innocence.
Jessika held the power here.
Forestalling her declaration of secession would mean the difference between having time enough for escape, and not. Another fool’s hope, considering her (at best) blind eye and (at worst) complicity in Axel’s intentions, but still the bluntest path towards securing their passage out of America swiftly. Given how recently Natalie burned at the hand of her own reckless actions she ought to think twice before jumping straight back into the flames. But it was not that which kept her silent to the suggestion.
So she choose trust, and told herself it was not an abandoning of promise, but a refusal to close the door on leaving Jay behind.
“I’ll see what I can do.” Her connections were tenuous at best, but she’d use them ruthlessly. Marcus’s reply awaited. She had yet to hear from Laurie. Neither could offer imminent solutions, though. She met his gaze. Uncertainty peppered his plan even as he spoke, seeking her opinion. His mild manner suggested him unsuited to the task for that alone, but sometimes manipulation didn’t need a sharp edge. “If you find him, and you’re confidant, there’s little point wasting time coming to find me first. We have little enough to go around as it is. But we only get one shot at this. If you’ve any doubt, Jensen, then let me do it.”
His repeat insistence of aid drew a small smile, despite the stubborn wall he hit. She wondered what demons he stacked on his own shoulders to couch it in such a way, but so far as Natalie was concerned his willingness to help erased any previous sin. “I’ll try not to take that as comment on how shit I must look right now.” It was a dry jest, sharpened with a smirk that took no insult at all. She shrugged. “A shower and some breakfast, I’ll feel fine.”
Little showed, of course. Compartmentalising was something she was good at, and the soothe of reassurance was ultimately no more useful to her than the fear billowing behind her ribcage. Even so, something of a dark smile hooked for the word normal, though she said nothing; it wasn’t like she didn’t understand the meaning. Though she doubted the ruse would hold for long.
“Are you sure you want to be the one to look for Axel?” She would not stop him, but neither would she allow a sense of duty to pull him into the arms of unnecessary pain. Though if Axel had an ounce of sense, he would not still be here. If it transpired he was, the risk must have some discernible gain for him, which might in turn allow for leverage. Or maybe he felt he had nothing to fear. It was a slim hope but better than idling while they waited for the noose to tighten. Truthfully it was not the descent of armies she feared, but something more insidious. Time haemorrhaged a fatal wound, and that was where the guilt gnawed; her reluctance to stem the flow.
Jensen urged temperance, but Natalie's gut burned for confrontation; for the tomb petty politics made of innocence.
Jessika held the power here.
Forestalling her declaration of secession would mean the difference between having time enough for escape, and not. Another fool’s hope, considering her (at best) blind eye and (at worst) complicity in Axel’s intentions, but still the bluntest path towards securing their passage out of America swiftly. Given how recently Natalie burned at the hand of her own reckless actions she ought to think twice before jumping straight back into the flames. But it was not that which kept her silent to the suggestion.
So she choose trust, and told herself it was not an abandoning of promise, but a refusal to close the door on leaving Jay behind.
“I’ll see what I can do.” Her connections were tenuous at best, but she’d use them ruthlessly. Marcus’s reply awaited. She had yet to hear from Laurie. Neither could offer imminent solutions, though. She met his gaze. Uncertainty peppered his plan even as he spoke, seeking her opinion. His mild manner suggested him unsuited to the task for that alone, but sometimes manipulation didn’t need a sharp edge. “If you find him, and you’re confidant, there’s little point wasting time coming to find me first. We have little enough to go around as it is. But we only get one shot at this. If you’ve any doubt, Jensen, then let me do it.”
His repeat insistence of aid drew a small smile, despite the stubborn wall he hit. She wondered what demons he stacked on his own shoulders to couch it in such a way, but so far as Natalie was concerned his willingness to help erased any previous sin. “I’ll try not to take that as comment on how shit I must look right now.” It was a dry jest, sharpened with a smirk that took no insult at all. She shrugged. “A shower and some breakfast, I’ll feel fine.”