03-29-2024, 10:26 PM
Nythadri was still bristling from the reaction when the door closed behind them, though it was dutifully contained behind a tight expression. She didn’t have time to indulge the irritation, so it only simmerred deeply, ignored but for the acknowledging touch of Jai’s hand on her shoulder. There was much still to consider before she’d truly rest, though she knew they both needed it. Dawn would come only too quickly.
“Do you want to go to Bandar Eban and check on Daryen?”
He lightly squeezed his grip, and she paused her stride to meet his gaze. Jai’s strength lightened the load of exhaustion, and she knew she could physically do it. What she was not sure was what they might find. Nothing touched her still expression, but there was no shield to guard pale eyes. It was not a question to placate, but one asked honestly, for she would never willingly put him in the position of having to choose.
The answer he gave she took at face value, though she was not quite so confident in his optimism. Daryen was far from defenceless, and had apparently spearheaded the front against one of the Forsaken to take Arad Doman in the first place. But a M’hael had fallen tonight, right in the seat of his own power, and an Amyrlin would likely fall right behind. No one was safe from the Shadow’s machinations. But the plain truth was they could not be everywhere at once, and she had suspicion enough to trust Jai’s judgement. Daryen told her where to find him, after all, and she could not think of another way Jai would know how to share his strength through the bond. “If that changes we will go. You will not need to explain it to me. We will just go.”
The promise was made without frills, as such things usually were with Nythadri.
She wanted to urge him on, away from shadowy corridors where they might at least reset the wards around their room. The fort was quite silent at this hour, but it was still unfamiliar, and she was not certain she’d ever shake the new cracks in her foundations. For now it made her wary of their surroundings. But the stumble over his words paused her. Amidst duty and responsibilities neither of them might have asked for was a very human pain. She was not sure Jai knew how to do anything but bury it, and certainly Nythadri had done similar all those years ago after Tash’s murder. She had never confided the depths of her grief in Farune. He had never even known she was nobility until the day she left for the Tower.
Talk of trust constricted a surprisingly sharp pain in her chest. She stood close, hands brushing his waist. If she did not want to linger, it was clearly not for fear of their compromising position; one of intimacy rather than seduction, despite their state of undress. “I would not make you come with me, except I would neither leave you behind,” she said. It was not what he was asking, and she did not mistake it for hesitation. Even if their path now did take them straight to the heart of Shayol Ghul, he would not pause before following her; she knew it for the same reason the reverse was true, bond or no bond. “We do not have to see them unless you choose to.”
Her eyes were soft, her voice softer, but she was not otherwise saccharine in her comfort. Neither did she expect him to acknowledge it, and perhaps tonight was not the right time to traverse those fragilities anyway. His family had always been a wound, compounded now with grief and guilt, though it went without saying that if he spoke she would listen. The world might actually fall down about their ears, and she would still find them shelter enough for that, no matter what it cost her. For now though she only slipped her arm inside his, and continued their stride. Distraction focused pain, a temporary salve, but that much she knew.
“The same,” she said, meaning Elsae’s identity.
“She’s not in trouble – not unless you count the interest of a dreadlord, at least. He says she is not a darkfriend, but he also thought she was Aes Sedai. Tonight is the first time he has described her as a key, but I couldn’t guess what that means. She is part of the bargain he made with Talin. I know little more than that, but I intend to give her the choice before I bring her here. I asked Eleanore to escort her from the Tower tonight. She has declared no ajah, and at least the Greens were already funnelling their aspirants out to safety, so it’s unlikely anyone will have noted her absence. They should both be safe.”
“Do you want to go to Bandar Eban and check on Daryen?”
He lightly squeezed his grip, and she paused her stride to meet his gaze. Jai’s strength lightened the load of exhaustion, and she knew she could physically do it. What she was not sure was what they might find. Nothing touched her still expression, but there was no shield to guard pale eyes. It was not a question to placate, but one asked honestly, for she would never willingly put him in the position of having to choose.
The answer he gave she took at face value, though she was not quite so confident in his optimism. Daryen was far from defenceless, and had apparently spearheaded the front against one of the Forsaken to take Arad Doman in the first place. But a M’hael had fallen tonight, right in the seat of his own power, and an Amyrlin would likely fall right behind. No one was safe from the Shadow’s machinations. But the plain truth was they could not be everywhere at once, and she had suspicion enough to trust Jai’s judgement. Daryen told her where to find him, after all, and she could not think of another way Jai would know how to share his strength through the bond. “If that changes we will go. You will not need to explain it to me. We will just go.”
The promise was made without frills, as such things usually were with Nythadri.
She wanted to urge him on, away from shadowy corridors where they might at least reset the wards around their room. The fort was quite silent at this hour, but it was still unfamiliar, and she was not certain she’d ever shake the new cracks in her foundations. For now it made her wary of their surroundings. But the stumble over his words paused her. Amidst duty and responsibilities neither of them might have asked for was a very human pain. She was not sure Jai knew how to do anything but bury it, and certainly Nythadri had done similar all those years ago after Tash’s murder. She had never confided the depths of her grief in Farune. He had never even known she was nobility until the day she left for the Tower.
Talk of trust constricted a surprisingly sharp pain in her chest. She stood close, hands brushing his waist. If she did not want to linger, it was clearly not for fear of their compromising position; one of intimacy rather than seduction, despite their state of undress. “I would not make you come with me, except I would neither leave you behind,” she said. It was not what he was asking, and she did not mistake it for hesitation. Even if their path now did take them straight to the heart of Shayol Ghul, he would not pause before following her; she knew it for the same reason the reverse was true, bond or no bond. “We do not have to see them unless you choose to.”
Her eyes were soft, her voice softer, but she was not otherwise saccharine in her comfort. Neither did she expect him to acknowledge it, and perhaps tonight was not the right time to traverse those fragilities anyway. His family had always been a wound, compounded now with grief and guilt, though it went without saying that if he spoke she would listen. The world might actually fall down about their ears, and she would still find them shelter enough for that, no matter what it cost her. For now though she only slipped her arm inside his, and continued their stride. Distraction focused pain, a temporary salve, but that much she knew.
“The same,” she said, meaning Elsae’s identity.
“She’s not in trouble – not unless you count the interest of a dreadlord, at least. He says she is not a darkfriend, but he also thought she was Aes Sedai. Tonight is the first time he has described her as a key, but I couldn’t guess what that means. She is part of the bargain he made with Talin. I know little more than that, but I intend to give her the choice before I bring her here. I asked Eleanore to escort her from the Tower tonight. She has declared no ajah, and at least the Greens were already funnelling their aspirants out to safety, so it’s unlikely anyone will have noted her absence. They should both be safe.”